give me the courage.

i'm not giving up till the very last day.
but is all this going to work?
you don't care.do you?
birthdays are nothing to you.
but do u know how much it means to me?!
i rarely had the chance to celebrate my birthday.
it was always the school reopen. and i can't blame that.can i?
but now,
for two consecutive years,
after many years of waiting,
it wasfinally a holiday.
and what's the difference?
i would rather go to school.
than to laze around feeling like a normal holiday.

for her birthday,you were so willing to do every preparations.
and mine?
you can't even give a damn about it.
would it be the same if i were as smart as her?

you have reasons for everything.
ridiculous reasons.

all i'm asking is just a simple celebration with the family and is that so difficult?!

if i miss this year,i don't know when will i be able to meet a holiday that falls on my birthday.
but it doesn't make a difference does it?
history will just repeart itself.
the same request.
the same rejection.
the same feeling.

i really hate my birthday now.
shouldn't i be excited that my birthdya is coming?
but why am i desperately hoping it to pass as soon as possible?

now, i hate it whenever my birthday is a holiday.
i'll be having the same wish
and having the same outcome.

i'm so stupid.
such an idiot.
knowing the outcome and yet having the same wish.

i'm just a stupid idiot having a wish to celebrate her birthday with her family.

i'll alight at your heart
9:57 PM

what's so difficult to celebrate a birthday
last year it was "what's so big deal about birthday? and 14 years old big ah"now it's " bbq?! see this type of weather,rain until liddat, how to bbq?!"
what's your problem!
everybody always look forward for their birthday
but why
WHY!
why must you make me sad every single time my birthday is nearing.
you suck.
all i wish is just a little celebration with the family
and it seems so difficult to fulfill.



all i wish is just a little celebration with the family.nothing more.

my wishes are never meant to come true anyway.
that's why they are wishes.
forever wishes.

i'll alight at your heart
9:54 PM